Saturday, May 23, 2009

The Life of a School Bus Driver


In the ongoing effort to support my family in the midst of this pathetic economy, I have done the unthinkable. No, I haven't robbed a fillin' station or anything like that. I have become a school bus driver.
There's nothing quite like it. The astronauts think they have responsibility. HA! Let them safely haul around 65 kids, half of which some people other than myself might want to strangle. Yep, during my two weeks of training I realized it was the most demanding job on earth, and only special people, like a mix of Army rangers and zombies, have what it takes.
So far I've just been a substitute. That in itself is pretty exciting. I imagine it's what explorers like Lewis and Clark must have felt like, being led around in place they've never seen before on the word of savages. I do have an advantage though. Instead of savages, I have kinder gardeners telling me where to go. I never realized that when it comes to giving directions that they are NOT the best people in the world to ask, but you live and learn.
Really, it is challenging, which makes it fun. I do feel somewhat like a traitor to who I was in school, but I realize there are some cool bus drivers out there, like Otto Man from the Simpsons. I'm sure I could write volumes on the adventures of a substitute bus driver, and if construction don't get better soon, I may have to.
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